Communication - Can you hear me now??

"Can you hear me now?  No??...too bad."

Isn't that what you wanna say to some people when you are trying to talk to them.  It's funny because when you ask people something like that they usually answer you.  And if the answer is no...uh they must've been able to hear you because they answered you. DUH.

Interesting is communication between husband and wife or boyfriend and girlfriend or any committed relationship.  Communication and its effectiveness all depends on mood.  If you're already in an agitated state then the warning lights should go off.  This is where the 'pushing of buttons' comes into play.  When in a normal mood or even better yet a good mood, communication is so easy and effortless.  But anything other than that everything takes some work.

Patience also comes into play.  When you are the one who is agitated it's very easy to lose all patience and not look at things from any other perspective than your own.  It is difficult to say the least.

Arguments are forms of communication. However they usually involve RAW emotions and lead to much worse things.  Arguments are not a win/lose kind of thing.  A lot of folks think "oh, I won that argument"...well you really don't win; you just were able to get out your perspective of what you were talking about you are finished with what you had to say on it.  The other person was nice enough to either understand or even just let you finish venting 'at their expense".  We are all the person who wants to "win" the situation but feel bad because usually the other person either looks like they have become the 'punching bag' or they feel bad because we have made them to feel that they are the reason we feel awful in the first place (which is usually not the story to begin with).

There are many circumstances in which this does and does not apply don't get me wrong.  Some time there are 2 people who are just out to win the argument and that is when people end up going to bed angry, break up, etc.

It's hard to see things from the outside in when you are in the middle of it.  Sometimes you do catch your breath but most of the time you don't.  IF  you in fact do, remember a short time after the battle of words is over you usually forget what it was about anyways.

Once you've said your piece, let it go.  Move on.  Don't fester with it, unless you like to make others feel awful or you are into fighting.  You'll find yourself more alone than you care to be.

And to the peace makers hang in there...it's all worth it in the end.

WTF, Facebook!?!

I'm not one to usually complain about changes, especially on a social media website. BUT....


WTF, Facebook!?!?!?!

These changes are so obsurd.  Literally almost every friend I have has or has had this morning a status displaying their DISLIKE of the new changes.

The ticker is kind of cool (I will admit) but these 'blue boxes' thing and selecting for us if they think we should only get certain types of updates from people??  Yeah, that's what I said.  If you move your cursor to the right side of the comment/status box you'll see some selections and concerning updates for an individual(s) are the following: All Updates, Some Updates, Important.  How in the heck do you classify "some" updates versus "important"????  This just really stinks.

I don't have time to go through each an every person I talk to and take the time to make priority lists and status criteria for EVERYONE.  This is becoming too much.  I got on here to stay in touch with my friends and not have to think about it.

Now we have to work and organize just to see the status of people that are important to us and even then we are not 100% sure if it is the most up to date/time status.

Rant done, for now.

Venting of energy

It certainly is interesting now when you get older how you handle different situations.

For example, when you get angry and are completely mad that you feel you are going to blow up.  What do you do?

When you are upset and so sad that you are just going to lose it.  What do you do?

I have found that my fuse for things, or the threshold to where I feel I'm going to explode or lose it has grown significantly (on most days).  However when it comes to things involving my children the fuse is not there and I have to react in the moment (which can be very awkward).

Taking a breath if you can, always seems to help release some of the original tension in a situation.... but haven't you found that sometimes holding your breath makes you feel more in control (or something to that affect) and if you release it the situation wins a little more??

My personal reaction to BOTH anger and sadness is crying.  Yep, crying (not all out bawling, but usually tearing up and such).  That is truly the safest way to release energy (for me) because I cannot lose it and hit/throw things.  I don't have the ability to leave the house and go to the gym like I used to (I'm also injured so that doesn't help either).  Sometimes talking things out...doesn't help and makes it worse (on certain occasions) because it is like adding fuel to the fire.

Another thing I have noticed that I do when upset on any level, if I do not cry/tear up I start cleaning.  Yep, cleaning.  It's a form of physical labor that can release some tension.   I find myself usually in the kitchen scrubbing things down or re-arranging stuff in the cabinets.

Do you have any habits that help you in a severe emotional fluctuation?  Even if you have kids or you don't we all seem to make it to this point some how.  What do you do?  Please share. 

Frustration with indecision

At some point I'm sure that all of us have dealt with the frustration of indecision or decisiveness.

I deal with it EVERY day.  I'm usually the decision maker at work where this is concerned and the worst topic where this is a problem is LUNCH.  Where to go or order from for lunch.  We've gone to such lengths as to even create a jar with places we like to go and types of food to order and pick from it when NO one has any idea what they want.

Then the process starts ALL over again at home, it's an all day thing if it is on the weekend.  Down to what are the kids going to wear, what to fix the kids for their meals what are we (the adults) going to eat?  What to do for activities?  Leaving the house?  Staying home?  Going to the store or order online? 

I know that all of this is really tiny on the larger scheme of things but when it happens all the time, it's hard to not think about it. 

Has this ever happened to you?  Do you get frustrated by things like this?

Sometimes I'm so relieved when other make those decisions for me.  But I'm sure just like everyone else my brain is tired and I'm so overly exhausted that the mindless things are so great.  We are currently considering structured meal planning at home (to help with this) especially since little H is now almost completely switched over to solids.  He's only got 8 teeth so some foods are still rather difficult.