Saying one thing and doing another....Grrr.

I have a pretty long fuse when it comes to many things.  But one thing that cuts my fuse to practically nothing is when people say one thing and either do another or do opposite what ever they said they would do.

When someone (and I'm not saying myself) has had a dream of something in their life.  And they count on others to be there for them for the support they so desperately need to make their dream a reality and then they are crushed down by the ones they need.  That just completely pisses me off.

I completely understand that sometimes circumstances change and such.  But those who promise one thing should at least try to do what they can or make it right with the person.  Not crush their hopes.  Or at least work to compromise and not cheapen the experience just to accommodate their needs (when it's not about them).

Maybe I'm just venting...well I know I am.  But how would you react?  Would you just cut the person out all together?  Would you confront them (a little harder, especially if it's family)?  Just ignore it (which is extremely difficult) and hope your dream is not completely ruined? 

There is no easy way on this.  I'm doing what I can to help, I just hope it is enough.

Communication - Can you hear me now??

"Can you hear me now?  No??...too bad."

Isn't that what you wanna say to some people when you are trying to talk to them.  It's funny because when you ask people something like that they usually answer you.  And if the answer is no...uh they must've been able to hear you because they answered you. DUH.

Interesting is communication between husband and wife or boyfriend and girlfriend or any committed relationship.  Communication and its effectiveness all depends on mood.  If you're already in an agitated state then the warning lights should go off.  This is where the 'pushing of buttons' comes into play.  When in a normal mood or even better yet a good mood, communication is so easy and effortless.  But anything other than that everything takes some work.

Patience also comes into play.  When you are the one who is agitated it's very easy to lose all patience and not look at things from any other perspective than your own.  It is difficult to say the least.

Arguments are forms of communication. However they usually involve RAW emotions and lead to much worse things.  Arguments are not a win/lose kind of thing.  A lot of folks think "oh, I won that argument"...well you really don't win; you just were able to get out your perspective of what you were talking about you are finished with what you had to say on it.  The other person was nice enough to either understand or even just let you finish venting 'at their expense".  We are all the person who wants to "win" the situation but feel bad because usually the other person either looks like they have become the 'punching bag' or they feel bad because we have made them to feel that they are the reason we feel awful in the first place (which is usually not the story to begin with).

There are many circumstances in which this does and does not apply don't get me wrong.  Some time there are 2 people who are just out to win the argument and that is when people end up going to bed angry, break up, etc.

It's hard to see things from the outside in when you are in the middle of it.  Sometimes you do catch your breath but most of the time you don't.  IF  you in fact do, remember a short time after the battle of words is over you usually forget what it was about anyways.

Once you've said your piece, let it go.  Move on.  Don't fester with it, unless you like to make others feel awful or you are into fighting.  You'll find yourself more alone than you care to be.

And to the peace makers hang in there...it's all worth it in the end.

Fear of doctors - from childhood to adulthood

When we are kids we really don't like doctors because they have "SHOTS" but they have really cool lollipops.  And really young we associate doctors with pain.  So we really don't like them at all and usually are afraid of them.
I've noticed more lately (especially in myself) that the fear of doctors does transfer from childhood to adulthood, but it changes (or adapts). 

As an adult we are not 'afraid' of the doctor...but we are fearful of what they are going to say.  It's the "BAD NEWS" that we don't want to hear.  And we are so relieved and happy when we get good news.  It's the bad stuff that makes us fearful.  The shots or blood work (usually/for most of adults) doesn't really bother us any more. 

I feel bad for those doctors who have to give bad news and how they must feel having to deliver it.  I'm sure they are just as afraid (sometimes) to give us that information.  But must feel even worse if they can't help us or if they cannot solve the problem immediately for us.  I commend them on being there for us and being educated enough to figure things out and helping us in a time of need.  Sometimes it's just as hard to receive as it is to deliver.

Just remember that next time you get upset at the doctor (or remember it after the fact) if you can.  Remember also the billing people have nothing to do with the doctors themselves...that is all coding and their staff there. LOL.  So billing is an entirely different can of worms.  HAHAHA

Wanna be a Whale or a Mermaid???

A while back, at the entrance of a gym, there was a picture of a very thin and beautiful woman. The caption was "This summer, do you want to be a mermaid or a whale?"

The story goes, a woman (of clothing size unknown) answered the following way:

"Dear people, whales are always surrounded by friends (dolphins, seals, curious humans), they are sexually active and raise their children with great tenderness.
They entertain like crazy with dolphins and eat lots of prawns. They swim all day and travel to fantastic places like Patagonia, the Barents Sea or the coral reefs of Polynesia.
They sing incredibly well and sometimes even are on cds. They are impressive and dearly loved animals, which everyone defend and admires.

Mermaids do not exist.

But if they existed, they would line up to see a psychologist because of a problem of split personality: woman or fish?
They would have no sex life and could not bear children.
Yes, they would be lovely, but lonely and sad.
And, who wants a girl that smells like fish by his side?

Without a doubt, I'd rather be a whale.

At a time when the media tells us that only thin is beautiful, I prefer to eat ice cream with my kids, to have dinner with my husband, to eat and drink and have fun with my friends.

We women, we gain weight because we accumulate so much wisdom and knowledge that there isn't enough space in our heads, and it spreads all over our bodies.
We are not fat, we are greatly cultivated.
Every time I see my curves in the mirror, I tell myself: "How amazing am I ?! "

(The girl on the picture is French model Tara Lynn)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

huge THANKS to Andrea Neuman who posted this for me to see and share with you all.

Stress, a way to approach it

 My friend Renee kindly reminded me of this:

 

A young lady confidently walked around the room while leading and explaining stress management to an audience; with a raised glass of water, and everyone knew she was going to ask the ultimate question, 'half empty or half full?'.....

She fooled them all...
"How heavy is this glass of water?", she inquired with a smile.
... Answers called out ranged from 8 oz. To 20 oz.

She replied, "The absolute weight doesn't matter.

It depends on how long I hold it.

If I hold it for a minute, that's not a problem.

If I hold it for an hour, I'll have an ache in my right arm.

If I hold it for a day, you'll have to call an ambulance.

In each case it's the same weight, but the longer I hold it, the heavier it becomes."

She continued, "and that's the way it is with stress. If we carry our burdens all the time, sooner or later, as the burden becomes increasingly heavy, we won't be able to carry on."

"As with the glass of water, you have to put it down for a while and rest before holding it again.

When we're refreshed, we can carry on with the burden - holding stress longer and better each time practiced.

So, as early in the evening as you can, put all your burdens down.

Don't carry them through the evening and into the night...
Pick them up tomorrow.

Whatever burdens you're carrying now, let them down for a moment.

Relax, pick them up later
After you've rested.

Life is short.

Enjoy it and the now 'supposed' stress that you've conquered!"
1. Accept the fact that some days you're the pigeon, and some days you're the statue!

2. Always keep your words soft and sweet, just in case you have to eat them.

3. Always read stuff that will make you look good if you die in the middle of it.

4. Drive carefully... It's not only cars that can be recalled by their Maker..

5. If you can't be kind, at least have the decency to be vague

6. If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again, it was probably worth it..

7. It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others.

8. Never buy a car you can't push.

9. Never put both feet in your mouth at the same time, because then you won't have a leg to stand on.

10. Nobody cares if you can't dance well.
Just get up and dance..

11. Since it's the early worm that gets eaten by the bird, sleep late..

12. The second mouse gets the cheese.

13. When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.

14. Birthdays are good for you.
The more you have,
The longer you live.

15. You may be only one person in the world, but you may also be the world to one person.

16. Some mistakes are too much fun to make only once.

17. We could learn a lot from crayons.
Some are sharp, some are pretty and
Some are dull. Some have weird
Names and all are different colors,
But they all
Have to live in the same box.

18. A truly happy person is one who can enjoy the scenery on a detour..

19. Have an awesome day and know that someone
Thought about you today.

20. It was me, your friend!

Save the earth -- It's the only planet with chocolate!